Living for tommorrow while dying right now

Disclaimer:I am not a professional writer so if you want to write a smart remark about my grammer you can bite my spell check.


Every breath I take every minute I spend I know it all could be over at a moments notice.I see people killing people and I see our President trying to instill  his values on me and all the propaganda .It takes me back to Heels vs faces from the modern era of wrestling...my era.Ric Flair and the Horsemen running wild up and down the coast while Hulk Hogan was branching out across  the world getting us to train and take our vitamins and say our prayers .I was taking my Flintstone vitamins ,running my mother and babysitters crazy with my taless and in the front yard almost daily me and my brothers were having wars of our own just like the Naitch and Hulkster did on our tvs each week.

When I was a kid I didn't think about sickness or people dying.I was a kid and all I cared about was baseball cards and wrestling magazines and comic books and Nintendo games and getting a sugar high whenever I could. Thats all I had to worry about.While my parents were downstairs going at eachothers throats about how they were going to pay that months bill  me and my brothers were upstairs in our own little world or outside discovering ourselves.

When I started to get sick  and reality started to breath a new meaning into me I still had my imagination and I still had my girlfriend pro wrestling and sometimes I would cheat on her with the new york mets and more recently the Alabama crimson tide but me and my lady pro wrestling always have had a strong love.


When Alabama was winning World championships and Ric Flair was wooing his way into our hearts I was trying to get by life by living in fantasy land .Whenever I have a problem I just shut it out and think what the Hulkster would do.I am 33  years old now ,not a kid anymore but my brain isn't like normal adults.I have a child complex.I have the mind of a little kid with adult sized problems.
Never learned to drive a car,never cared to learn to drive a car. Never had the desire to .God gave me feet to walk so I walk everywhere or catch a ride.Its what I always did and have always done.


When a doctor gives you some bad news and you don't really know how to understand it or cope with it cause you have been trapped in your childlike mind for all eterenity its kinda jaw dropping its like when Hulk Hogan told his fans to stick it.I never saw Hulk Hogan the same way after that but like all people..well some people I believe in forgiveness and when Hulk Hogan decided to ride with Hulkamania again I took him back like the faithful follower but it wasn't the same.

With all the wrestlers switching sides all the time its become a normal thing but back than when a face turned heel or a heel turned face it was a huge deal.. but now not so much.

So when my doctor went heel on me and put me in peril like a true baby face I was down for the count but I am making my come back .I am hulking up and I will come out on top.


I am Hixenbaugh hear me Roar

JH